a new year, a new-er me?

resolutions.
we make 'em.
we break 'em
we bend 'em & try to make amends with ourselves to keep 'em.

I've made my fair share of new year's resolutions but like everyone else, I start off with great ambitions & hopes but then see myself giving up or slacking off - and it's not even the end of the 1st month of the year!

Around the first week of December, I decided I would make 3 'goals', not resolutions (resolutions to me always felt like 'I'm need to change whatever it is I'm doing because was wrong or bad' which most of the time it was, but it isn't always the case), but personal goals for the upcoming year to try to challenge myself & also keep myself in check. They were:

1. Stop smoking
2. Write more (not just specifically here, but in general)
3. Expose myself to different forms of writing

It is now January 6th, 2010. I can tell you at this very moment, I have been successful with one goal, have failed at another (not even 24 hours into the new year), and the last I am attempted to redeem myself ( while writing at this moment) from now and into the rest of the year.

Smoking - This would be the goal I broke immediately (I had cigarettes left & they're expensive!) I truly want to quit, I do, and I have honestly tried a few times in the last 3 years. I've tried the patch & justcold turkey, but not much success. The only success I had with quitting (i quit for about 3 1/2 months) was when I took Chantix. It worked but I didn't take it for the entire time it was prescribed (3 months) because it was $150 for a month's prescription (none of it covered by insurance by the way) so I only took it for a month. What I have been doing is cutting down A LOT. I now only smoke between 2-4 cigarettes a day. To say I would quit is a great goal, but at this moment is not entirely realistic for me but I'm consciously making an effort to not smoke as much. That has to count for something.

Write more - As I type, I am accomplishing this goal! Ok, Ok... that's a cop out. But I started this blog back in September not really sure what I wanted to do with it. I do want to use it to vent, give myself an outlet to clear my mind and post my writing. I'm going to aim to blog at least 3 times a week - I think that I can handle that.

Get More Writing Experience - This is the one goal I have been successful with so far. Technically, I started working on it December, but that was more researching & inquirying. I'm taking a Playwriting workshop next week & will be taking an 8-week storytelling class @ the PIT starting in about 2 weeks, that will have a class performance at the end(uhoh)! I have some other classes & workshops that I have interest in & want to take throughout the year, especially the Level III Neo workshop (if they offer it this year). This goal is the most exciting but also the most nerve-racking at the same time. I'm excited to learn dive into different styles of writing, especially playwriting, and learn more about my writing. And this goal will help feed my desire to do the previous goal!

So here is my revised goal list for 2010:

1. Cut down on smoking
2. Blog more (but also write more in general)
3. Get more writing experience
4. Read 25 books I've never read
5. Drink more water

I decided to add 2 smaller goals to my list because I know I can do them fairly easily & both will be mentally & physically good for me.

Wish me luck!